Meghan reflects on her fifteen years of spiritual development work and Ayahuasca shamanic apprenticeship, as well as the nature of intimacy in its purest form…

Meghan expereinces the opening of a crazy spiritual whirlwind with her co-worker turned friend, Zach. Neither of them had any idea what was in store…

“One of the common misconceptions is that the purging ends when the ceremony does. This can be true at times, but is often not the case at all. Sometimes physical purging continues into the next day or two, but emotional purges (depending on their nature and severity) can open up a Pandora's Box and continue on at times for months…”

“We hear the term "integration" used often within the Ayahuasca community. It's for a reason. Without personal aftercare, acclimation and integration of our ceremonial experiences, a person can be left with newfound information they feel they can't use, sometimes causing more internal strife now that they know what they're missing. Ayahuasca spiritual integration is the key to allowing the Medicine work to "take", and show up not only within ourselves, but in the physical world around us…”

“…What I learned over the last five years (having zero ceremonies from 2012 - 2018) is how to integrate what I'd learned in the first 250 ceremonies. I learned how to be gentle on myself, and how doing everything "the hard way" is not only violent to the self, it is one of the least effective approaches (since it requires a constant internal battle which leads to exhaustion/depression/overwhelm/burnout…)”

“…It’s hard to believe it’s been almost nine years since I first stepped foot into the Amazon jungle. It was like a dream that lasted for years; so hyper-real that it now seems almost like an illusion…”

“…In the world of Ayahuasca, deep in the Amazon rainforest, it is not uncommon for the shamans to refer to their own personal “Medicine”, almost as a separate, yet connected entity to “The Medicine” as we often refer to these plant spirits.

But what does that mean? Who has Medicine, how quickly and to what level does it accrue, and how does one maintain it? How is one shaman’s Medicine different from another’s? Or in comparison to a person who has had only five ceremonies?”

“…You want to know how to be a mother? Teach this child to love without fear, by example." It strikes me this is exactly what the Medicine does - loving unconditionally as we release our darkness into her open arms…”